Guide to Living #2
Right before I was diagnosed with cancer, I felt trapped at work. I had no one else to blame but myself, because I took on WAY too much. I mean, way way too much. I was doing at least 3 full time jobs and trying to smash it all in a single workweek.
I was constantly working. My quality of work was plummeting, and no one seemed happy despite how hard I worked. Everything was behind, and I had a nasty feeling in the pit of my gut every time I got up.
And, oh yeah...it was around that time that I started having blood in my crap.
So I went to therapy, thinking it was all stress related. My therapist told me I was nuts for doing the stuff I was doing. I wanted to cut back on my work, but it seemed so far along, and I had so much to make up that I had no idea how I would do it. I was stressed to the max, I was having cancer symptoms, and I felt I had no way out.
Until I got cancer.
Getting cancer was a really sucky way to get out of my jam, but it worked. Everyone, from family to my workplace, backed off. It was the break I needed to completely restart my life. I cut out over half of all my duties at work, I stopped trying to be superman, and nobody got in my way. My bosses were stellar, and frankly, they let me off the hook on a lot of stuff. I was supported beyond what was fair for them. They saw I needed help, and getting cancer helped all of us see it.
We all get in ruts, and sometimes those ruts just eat away at us like a cancer. They strip you of your happiness and chop away your ability to break free. These ruts deplete you of energy and then shame you for looking miserable and doing nothing about it.
And I hope to God Almighty that cancer isn't your break from the rut like it was for me. But whatever your break, take it when it pops up. The world will never care enough about your well-being in the way that you need.
If you're stressed out, feeling hopeless, or not sure where to go next, look for those breaks or those second chances and embrace them...even if it's cancer.